So yesterday I turned 30. Everybody says that once you hit 30, your life changes, and you grow into yourself. Personally, I don't feel any different. The normal aches and pains of my 20s seem to have followed me here, and I guess all in all, I can't complain too much. I'm falling apart, but the journey so far has been worth it. Currently I am sitting home alone, listening to the cat snarf away at her cat food, and the dogs roam around the house bored. I feel thier pain. My family left hours ago on a trip to Kansas City and I opted to stay home and watch the mutts. It's relaxing but depressing at the same time. I miss my heathens.
The bright side is, I'm home alone..which means nobody to yell at, nobody to have to share my treats with, and I can do what I want! Though it's not really as glorious as it sounds. When you're used to the chaos, not having it just makes you feel.. lonely. OH WELL
We're supposed to get an icky storm tonight, that is supposed to bring with it ice and sleet. I went to walmart earlier and stocked up on a few essentials, ( dill chips and pizza yeahh!!! ) , and now bunkering down. Macgyver bought me a one hour massage out in town for tomorrow but I'm sure if the weather is as icky as they say it's going to be, I will have to reschedule. I don't mind though. Nowhere I have to be. One advantage of being so far out in the country is that you get back to what the basics really mean. Hanging out nightly with family, seting up your routines. I know that when I blink, my children will be older and having kids of thier own, and macgyver and I will be old and grey. I'm just cherishing the time I do have.
The princess has really started clinging to me lately and I'm not quite sure why. She makes me walk her to class in the morning and then she always says " I wish you could stay/eat lunch with me". I can't always stay though and it breaks her little heart. She didn't have an issue with this at the beginning of the year though. The wee man ( son ) was on the verge of tears today because I was not going with them on thier trip. He has been clinging to me too. The only thing I can think of is that ever since I got sick back in September, they have been really scared I will go away, and so they want to cling to me to make sure it doesn't happen. It was a scary time, and I haven't delt with it at all. I am making sure I stay healthy though, they need me around and magyver needs someone around to remind him to stop and eat once in a while. This house would fall into complete chaos if I wasn't here to maintain it. At least I know I'm important. Anywhoozles...
Spring is getting closer, but I think it's going to need a kick in the ass to come fully. Today it was 65 degrees! And tonight, 25 with freezing rain. I'm not quite sure what Nebraska is thinking having such wonky weather but it needs to STOP. I want to warm my toes in the sun already!!
Speaking of random subjects, I've been really working hard trying to get everything prepared for the school carnival. It's a lot to deal with and trying to get donations from people is like pulling teeth. I have faith it will all come together though. Hopefully...maybe... Yeah I have the faith.Meanwhile still trying to get my team prepared for competition on the 26th. My team meaning 5 4th and 5th graders. It's nerve racking because they are so hyper and wound up when I get them, but again, I have the faith it will go smoothly. So many things happening. April 2nd I will breathe a huge sigh of reliefe I'm sure. Anyway, I'm off now, to sit in the silence and ponder my mortality.
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